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Peeves, Pets

It’s A Dog’s Life

02.18.11 | 1 Comment

So we got a new puppy, a beagle whom we have named Rose. And by “we” I mean “my wife and kids”, as I was not exactly consulted about this. Which makes it really odd that I’m the one elected to get up in the night and let her go out to pee.

This was more of a problem before the past couple of weeks, when she’s mostly been sleeping through the night, much to my relief. Waking up for half an hour at three-hour increments was taking its toll on my sanity, not to mention my sense of humor. But it looked like that phase was, finally over.

Until last night.

Last night Rose woke up at 1:30. And 2:30. And 4:00. And 5:15. I was not happy with this development, and let it be known. I even spanked her at one point, which I now sincerely regret. Really, Rose, I’m sorry.

‘Cause this morning I learned why she kept waking up. As usual, it involved someone interfering in my plans.

(Sidebar: As a certified professional geek, I make a plan for pretty much any activity. Usually not written down – who needs notes! – but I always have an idea for the order in which I want to do things. Which, of course, is the optimal order.)

The trouble started night before last, when my wife noted that Rose’s dog bed was getting pretty rank. I, man that I am, didn’t notice any particular odor, but I’ve learned to take my wife’s word on these things. Since I had some laundry of my own to do, and since we needed the dog bed for, you know, her to sleep in, I decided that:

  1. I would wash my clothes and load them in the dryer.
  2. Next morning, as soon as I got up (the puppy is always up before me), I would take her bed and load it in the washing machine.
  3. By the time I was ready to head to work, Rose’s bed would be ready for the dryer. When bedtime came, her now sweet-smelling bed would be ready.

Unfortunately my wife decided that plan was too simple and logical. So while I was in the shower she restarted the wash cycle to MAKE DAMN SURE that the bed was clean. So, though it was still washing when I had to leave, I extracted a promise from my oldest to move it over to the dryer before he had to catch the bus.

Do you see where I’m going with this?

I had a soccer game to play in, so I didn’t get home until after the dog’s bedtime. Unbeknownst to me, her bed had not made it to the dryer, much less back into her kennel. So yeah, she was a little uncomfortable sleeping on the floor, and I can’t blame her. And of course I feel like a TERRIBLE dad for getting on to her.

The lesson: DON’T TOUCH THAT, I’M STILL USING IT!

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