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Football, Sports

Beatdown

12.29.08 | Comment?

Well, Tony Romo and the Cowboys complete their swan dive into putridity yesterday, getting their asses thoroughly handed to them by arch-rival Philadelphia Eagles. As I told a friend of mine, in some parts of New Orleans you’d pay up to $50 to get spanked like that. As MJD over at Shutdown Corner put it, “It’s a damn shame that the Lions didn’t have the Cowboys on the schedule this week.”

The Cowboys weren’t the only ones falling juuuuust a bit short, of course. The Jets lost to the Dolphins, the Buccaneers lost to the Raiders (the Raiders!), and Denver got horse-whipped by San Diego in the official Ed Hoculi Redemption Game.

There’s only really two teams that have a shot in the NFC, the Giants and Carolina, and you have to figure the Giants are the favorites. The AFC, on the other hand, is so loaded that a very good Patriots team is staying home despite winning 11 games, three more than division champs Arizona or the afore-mentioned Chargers.

As for the Cowboys, they have underperformed for years now. Tony Romo is a good quarterback but he needs to lay off the hand lotion. Silky-smooth skin is not worth throwing the ball around like it’s a live hand grenade. Wade Phillips is a nice guy and an excellent defensive coordinator, but he just doesn’t have what it takes to be a head coach in the NFL. I certainly hope he lands on his feet – somewhere else.

Can Jason Garrett whip the team into shape? Who knows? Jerry Jones has said that the coaching staff will be returning intact in 2009, so we won’t find out for a while yet. Maybe never, if Garrett decides he’d like to actually have some say in how the team is run.

No one can doubt Jerry Jones’ ability to make a lot of money. Unfortunately, he has not shown much ability to put together a winning football team. Hopefully his next plastic surgery will stretch his mouth so tight he’ll lose the ability to speak, forcing him to finally hire someone who knows what they’re doing.

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